child of the other side




http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d118/marlietje/poemdinges.jpg
Winners of the July contest:
First place: Smoky 
Second place: Tarantallegra 
Third place: child of the other side


Hello everybody and welcome to a new English Poetry Contest!
This challenge will be organized every month, by Marlie (Child of the other side) and Charlotte (Sweet Hermione).

The idea is very simple. We decide the subject, you write the poem. (And of course, we’ll try to make an entry as well.) This can be anything that’s inspiring; another poem, a lyric, a title, a picture, a word, etc. We’ll try to vary the subject as much as possible. 


ATTENTION EVERYONE, THERE IS A NEW RULE

Every participant has to maintain the following rules 

- You are not allowed to write more than one poem per contest 
- The poem must be yours 
- The poem must have something to do with the subject. Please write a few words above/below your poem to tell us a little about it (just like you usually do) 
- Don’t comment on other people, you can do that via the pb-button or during the voting 
- Don’t make your poem too long, 5 pages about one subject is boring 
- Let someone beta it. There are many beta-readers on HPF and Cotos, TONKS and SH are willing to assist people who do want to compete but are not that good in English. With the right words your poem reads a lot easier. Don’t be ashamed just pb 
- You must send your poem to SH or to Cotos; you’re no longer allowed to post it by yourself 
About the voting.

- Don’t vote for yourself nor before SH or I give permission. If you do your vote won't count 
- Explain with more then 15 words why you’ve chosen a certain poem. “I love it” won’t do 
- You only have three votes. The first vote will be 3 points, the second vote 2 points, and your last vote will be 1 point. We will count all these points per person. The three poets with the most points are the winners. Please, place these votes in the same post and think before you make a choice, we don’t appreciate cheaters 
- You have to vote before the given date, if you cast your vote later it doesn’t count
Well, those were the rules and now the most important part; PRIZES! 

1st place - 40 sickles 
2nd place - 30 sickles 
3rd place - 20 sickles

No one can win the first price more than 3 times in a row. If so, SH and I will decide what to do. I hope you all understand why we do this.


The subject of this contest will be a lyric. This lyric;

Why
How many times do I have to try to tell you
That I'm sorry for the things I've done
But when I start to try to tell you
That's when you have to tell me
Hey... this kind of trouble's only just begun
I tell myself too many times
Why don't you ever learn to keep your big mouth shut
That's why it hurts so bad to hear the words
That keep on falling from your mouth
Falling from your mouth
Falling from your mouth
Tell me...
Why
Why

I may be mad
I may be blind
I may be viciously unkind
But I can still read what you're thinking
And I've heard is said too many times
That you'd be better off
Besides...
Why can't you see this boat is sinking
(this boat is sinking this boat is sinking)
Let's go down to the water's edge
And we can cast away those doubts
Some things are better left unsaid
But they still turn me inside out
Turning inside out turning inside out
Tell me...
Why
Tell me...
Why

This is the book I never read
These are the words I never said
This is the path I'll never tread
These are the dreams I'll dream instead
This is the joy that's seldom spread
These are the tears...
The tears we shed
This is the fear
This is the dread
These are the contents of my head
And these are the years that we have spent
And this is what they represent
And this is how I feel
Do you know how I feel ?
'cause I don't think you know how I feel
I don't think you know what I feel
I don't think you know what I feel
You don't know what I feel
(This lyric belongs to Annie Lennox, don’t steal or reproduce it please.)


The task is simple; you can choose whether you write a poem about the whole lyric/a stanza/a sentence/the title/the expressions/etc. You can also use words of the lyric in your poem or name your poem after one of the phrases. The only thing that’s not allowed is to use more than one whole sentence of the lyric in your poem. 

Please send your poem between the 4th and the 22th of August to us (Cotos will go on holiday on the 10th so please send your poems to SH after that date.) 
And you can vote between the 23th and 30th of August. 


We wish everybody good luck and lots of fun. If you have any suggestions, tips, notes or ideas; feel free to use the lovely pb-button, it’s begging to be pushed. 

Charlotte (Sweet Hermione) and Marlie (Cotos).


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Sweet Hermione




1st poem

Life like this 
she breaks the dawn with cold delight 
rays of sun take flight 
through her opened hands 
through her spread fingers, now 

he cracks open the face of the earth 
the bubbling lava drips 
down his melting summer shoes 
down his shrinking toes, now 

they set the sun with tender touch 
the floating clouds wave 
between their dancing hairs 
between their smiling faces, now 

do you know me, 
mother earth and father heavens 
as you release the thunder 
over the years that we have spent 
in silent serenity? 

moon wraps up my sins, my sins 
i do not dread the night 
no more.


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Sweet Hermione




2nd poem

For this poem, I used the sentence 'This is the fear' from the lyrics. When I read the sentence, a poem immediately formed in my head. 
It is a very personal poem, and I'm not gonna explain it (simply because I can't), but I think it discribes my feelings pretty well..(which means to me that I've succesfully written it). 

---

This is the fear 

Afraid 
I’ve always been 
The weight of the fear 
Has always aggravated my heart 
Every time I saw you crying 
Inside 

This is the fear 
The fear of losing you 
Of seeing you close your eyes 
Never to open them again 
Of seeing you escaping the world 
Never to come back again 

This is the fear 
I’ve never told you about 
And never will 
‘Cause I’m afraid 
Afraid that my fear 
Will be the drop 
That makes the bucket 
Overflow 

This is the fear 


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Sweet Hermione




3rd poem

Ok, I thought this one might be in need of a bit of an explanation. After actually listening to the song and having read it twice, I thought it was time for me to analyze it... So that I did. To me, I realised, the lyrics to this song deal with being in a relationship that's on the edge of collapse.. Scared as you are, you are not willing to give it up, yet remaining silent all the time and not wanting to hurt the person by telling him what's wrong or what needs to change - not willing to break his heart, you slowly start to live a lie and break your own instead. Can't you see this boat is sinking? in my eyes refers to the relationship being on its breaking point. Let's go down to the waters edge and we can cast away these doubts ... let's go and talk about it, she's saying here. Yet: Some things are better left unsaid. And not saying anything about it is not gonna change anything... and in the end will mean the destruction of your relationship. You know it's time to put an end to it, because it's simply not working. But you can't. You can't tell him how you feel, why you act the way you do, because the truth hurts too frigging much. So yeah. On the account of this interpretation, I wrote the following poem. The flower is just an imagery, really, as I hope you'll soon come to realise. 

---


Silent ways, silent winds, silent whispers 
A silent breeze that shakes the flower’s solid stem 
Shakes it, never breaks it 
Tickles petals, scared to damage them. 
Acid rays, acid rain, acid rivers 
The flower grows but never shall its soft pink petals bloom 
Frowning, as she’s drowning, 
Why she’s there, and what was it that caught her in this doom 
Luscious lies, luscious love, luscious liqueurs 
The mellow sound of silence gives a cry 
Kissing, the past reminiscing 

Crack. 

The stem did break and now in fields of gold does lie.


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Sweet Hermione




4th poem

When I read the lyrics, one sentence just popped out: Falling from your mouth. I didn't even read the rest of the text, I knew this was it. So I pasted the those words in a word doc, and immediately, the first stanza was born. The second stanza was harder and the third was easy again. It's different from my usual stuff and I think I can say one of the best I've ever written. I hope you'll like it =D 

---

Losing my religion 
Falling from your mouth 
those syllables from grace. 
High heels and make-up, 
flashing lights in the dark. 

Touch of our lips evolves into 
counting of freckles on our skin. 
Loss of gravity in the night, 
sorrow seems forgotten. 

The end coming near 
but still floating up in the sky. 
Fireworks and bodies, 
tomorrow shall be gone.


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Sweet Hermione




5th poem

This was a difficult subject for me. It’s not that I didn’t like the lyrics, there was just nothing that popped in my head, as it usually does when I’m trying to write a poem. I decided the moment I re-read the lyrics the fifth time I’d use the first two lines. ‘How many times do I have to tell you, I’m sorry for the things I’ve done.’ To me, that is someone feeling sorrow about a broken relationship. But it’s also someone being annoyed that his/her apology isn’t accepted. I started with the title and the last stanza. Then the inspiration started coming and eventually my poem even became a little story. If you read really well, you might get it. But maybe it’s only clear for me, because I’m the one who wrote it. 

-- 

Happily ever after is just a metaphor 

Merrily stomping on my brain, 
you unleashed the monster, 
that wants, that craves, 
to dance outside in purple rain. 

Packing up my wooden toys, 
screams tell me to stay put. 
But I am leaving anyway, 
ignoring all the noise. 

Up our road to world wide fame, 
my heart fell off a cliff. 
A relationship gone bad, 
and I will take the blame. 

The little things that make you itch, 
twirl the knife inside my chest. 
Because the lesson I’ve learned is, 
Love is just a bitch.


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Sweet Hermione




Hey folks,

I'm going on holiday to Newcastle *points below her post*.
You still can send your poems to me. 
I will post them on the 22th or the 23, depends on... well, when I will be able to.
After I got the last poems, we can vote.

May creativity be with you! *smile*


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Sweet Hermione




 6th poem

I've tried several times to write a poem using certain words from the lyrics, but it just didn't work. In the end I took the sentence 'Let's go down to the water's edge', because I could do a lot with it, and got this poem. It's centered around love, like the lyrics (at least I interpret them to be), and... well, how saddening it sometimes can be, I guess. 

The ashes of our love 

Using blotchy ink and discolored paper 
Of my face you’d use to make a sketch 
And I would wait ‘til you were done 
Together, we’d go down to water’s edge. 

Our love was short yet as long as ages 
It was like a burning fire with red flame; 
Passionately, heatedly, without rationality 
And never our game of love was the same. 

You were a talented artist, a honorable poet 
The adventurers in your stories always bold 
Wile we lay together, you’d eagerly tell me 
them; but aside from that, you were so cold… 

Like the fire our love was, of course it burned down 
‘Cause as fiery and great our love might have been 
You were as cold as snow and chased me away; but 
though you will, I won’t forget the stories I’ve seen.


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child of the other side




 7th poem

I decided to write a poem about the title and the emotions because they are the strongest and most important parts of the lyric. The poem is not too hard to understand, I’ve had the same thoughts as most of us had; a relationship that is sinking. Or perhaps it has never been good.


Why

The dark fire awakens
When flames are cast away
Shred pieces of a life
Too few to make a decent stay

Closed eyes still see
Deeds that can’t be undone 
Birds caught in leather straps
A single hand to kill the sun

Broken tears to mend
Wounds that weren’t there before
Striptease on my bare shoulders
I can’t feel the difference anymore

All those harsh words
You yelled but dreaded to do
Whips slapping on diabolic wings
Your blindness being our final foe


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child of the other side




And now, it is time to vote, my dearies.

About the voting
- Explain with more then 15 words why you’ve chosen a certain poem. “I love it” won’t do 
- You only have three votes. The first vote will be 3 points, the second vote 2 points, and your last vote will be 1 point. We will count all these points per person. The three poets with the most points are the winners. Please, place these votes in the same post and think before you make a choice, we don’t appreciate cheaters 
- You have to vote before the given date, if you cast your vote later it doesn’t count
How to vote:

My first/second/third vote goes to poem number: 
Because: 


You can vote between the 27th and 2nd (24.00 h.) Good luck with voting everyone.
SH and I can't vote due the new rule so it's all up to you guys now. (:


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Smoky




Right, I'm making up for not voting last contest, by being the first one to vote now :')


My first vote goes to poem number:
7

Because:
The title isn't super appealing, but you're poem is pretty impressive! I especially like the second stanza. ''A single hand to kill the sun'' Wow 0.o that's good.  It's really deep and obvious at the same time, which makes it nice to read.


My second vote goes to poem number:
6

Because: 
The title fits the lyrics perfectly. I love your vocabulary and I like the rhyme. You play with the words which is nice to read. For instance: ''Passionately, heatedly, without rationality'' That's so good!
The ending is sad, but sweet. 


My third vote goes to poem number:
2

Because:
The phrase ''This is the fear'' is good, strong. It's the base for a good poem. I like that that phrase comes back over and over again. It's cool that you've described you're own feelings. Like the rythm and your voc is good.


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LavenderBrown




My first vote goes to poem number: 7
Because: Omgwtfpretty! I think I recognize the writing style, but I'm not sure, but I am sure that I love this poem. A single hand to kill the sun reminds me of something and guh - although the last line is not smashing (I don't like the word 'being' in it), this poem matches the song awesomely.

My second voete goes to poem number: 6
Because: From the first line to the last, I'm absolutely in love with this one <3 I won't forget the stories I've seen? I won't forget this poem =D

My third vote goes to poem number: 5
Because: Haha, I think I know who wrote this, as well, excellent vocabulary and I love 'my heart fell off a cliff' (must hurt) in it, as well as the rhyme, with of course the awesome ending, love is just a bitch xD
Nice!


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FelixdeFeniks




I'm just in time to vote!^^ It was hárd to choose this time; they were all so good! Ö

My first vote goes to: nr. 3!
I think it's really really really pretty. I like the rhyme and the repetition ("Silent ways, silent winds, silent whispers", "acid rays, acid rain, acid rivers"). The ending is really powerful and a bit...experimental xD ...but I love it! I think may recognise the writing style, but I'm really not sure. Good job!

My second vote goes to: nr. 5!
Because I like all the metaphors/similes and the fact that it rhymes. The rhythm is good as well, and the last stanza is kind of unexpectedly funny xD Very beautiful and cleverly written!

My third vote goes to: nr. 6!
Because I love the title xD Nah, kidding, I love the poem in general. It's very narrative and different from the other poems. I really like the fire-metaphorthingy and the last sentence is really pretty. And again, the rhyme is really good. Nice nice nice beautiful!


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Darren




My first vote goes to the sixth poem. It’s beautiful. I love the way you are able to use your words! It’s amazing. The poem is wonderful. I can’t really explain why, but it’s really pretty. ^^ You did a great job and I think that you’ll come very far if you continue to work in poetry. The poems great and the writer is, for sure, a really talented person.

My second vote goes to the seventh poem. Gawd, it’s soo third and last vote goes to the first poem. Beautiful! I think you’re really good in describing things that are happening. Another person with a lot of talent! xD I think all the poems have something that makes them special, but in my opinion these poems were the best.


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Sweet Hermione




 @ Darren: Sorry, you were too late.   Pity favorism isn't allowed... 'cause I met you xD

The results!

1 - 7th poem: Child Of The Other side (6 points)
2 - 6th poem: Remus (5 points)
3 / 4 - 5th poem: Smoky (3 points)
3 / 4 - 3th poem: Tarantallegra (3 points)
5 - 2th poem: Loesewies Boterslag (1 point)

So, that'll be:

First place: Child Of The Other Side - 40 sickles
Second place: Remus - 30 sickles
Third / fourth place: Smoky / Tarantallegra - 20  sickles

Congrats! 

Cotos and I already have an idea for the next poetry-contest,
so the September-Contest will be opened soon!

To all the other poets: Thank you for joining.
I think that the poems you sended for this contest were all very good.
I actually thought they were better than the ones before, and I think some people can agree with me. :')  


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